Is It Okay to Doubt God?
Have you ever doubted God? Have your circumstances led to you questioning His Word, His character or even His existence? How did you feel after those doubtful thoughts?
Almost all Christians have experienced doubt, varying from a singular fleeting thought or a full blown existential crisis. But I’ve found that most Christians admit to doubting well after it has been “resolved” — very few express their doubts as they are experiencing them. The reason we hide our doubts can be a complex mix of emotions: fear, shame, confusion, suspicion of others, dismissiveness, etc. Is doubt as bad as we think it is? How does God view our doubt?
I am very familiar with doubt. Sparked by a confusing and painful circumstance in my life, I began to question the truths of scripture. Each question led to a deeper, more doubtful question, until I reached the bottom of the barrel: “Is God real? Am I real? How can I trust that anything I believe to be real actually exists?”. It was a literal existential crisis. These questions lingered for months. The faith I had grown up with seemed to escape me every time I reached for it. In shame and confusion, I resisted telling anyone what I was wrestling with, so I sat in the darkness of my mind for way too long. At one point, I had to ask myself if I’d ever consider myself a Christian again.
But what I failed to recognize is that the Spirit of the living God was already dwelling within me, preparing me to rebuild my faith from the ground up, with a surer and sturdier foundation than ever before. It’s like the Spirit took me through the house I had built for my faith. I didn’t realize how flimsy it was until every inch was inspected and pulled apart. He walked me into a faith renovation I didn’t know I needed. After a while, God had rebuilt my faith in a way that changed my life for the better.
There are many ways that doubt creeps in. Often in the midst of a doubting season, a person will point to a theological issue as the start of their deconstruction. But from conversations I’ve had (and my own experience), it usually actually starts with a moment of suffering or a painful experience with the church. Self-proclaimed believers act hypocritically or ignorantly, someone sins against you, or you walk through a situation that is difficult to reconcile with God’s goodness. In these cases, the doubt was a symptom of a deeper wound or resentment.
Does this mean our doubt is invalid? No, I believe it is an invitation to draw near to God. The shock or pain from our experiences leads to a double-take. We find ourselves unexpectedly thrown off by God or the substance of our faith, and we lean in to take a closer look, to question and analyze. Because God is who He says He is, when we actually evaluate what we’re seeing, we’re likely to discover evidence that He was right all along. The danger is if we do not also investigate our pain points. If left untouched, they will grow an blind us to the truth we’re looking for.
In Luke 24:36-49, this exact scenario plays out. In summary, Jesus appears to His disciples after His resurrection and they are thrown off. Jesus identifies their doubts, He addresses their doubts by showing them His hands, He feeds them, and He reveals the Father’s plans. What does this teach us about how God views our doubts?
He sees us. No doubtful thought has ever escaped His attention. Just because you are questioning Him does not mean He is pulling away from you.
He does not dismiss the doubts or shame them. Instead, He answers our questions with grace and patience.
He cares for our needs, especially the ones that get brushed aside when our doubts consume us. He is nourishing our invisible hunger even while we’re distracted.
At the end of our doubt experience, He deepens our understanding of who He has always been. Our eyes are opened to His purposes for us in light of the cross.
Just as God uses suffering to refine us like gold (1 Peter 1:6-7), He uses our moments of doubt to give us deeper, lasting faith. Our new understanding of who He is leads us to greater degrees of zeal and praise.
To those currently doubting: although you may not see it, the Spirit is at work within you. Bring your doubts before the Lord — it’ll feel weird to pray to God when you aren’t sure if He’s there, but try it anyway. Ask Him to reveal any hidden pains that may be igniting these doubts. Keep a lookout for His answers and cling tightly to any moment of genuine faith.
To those who haven’t doubted much or have walked out of seasons of doubt: remember that faith is a gift (1 Corinthians 12:9). Your ongoing belief and faithfulness is a work that God has upheld in your heart. Give Him thanks for sustaining faith that is “the assurance of things hoped for, the hope of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1).